Gone
by hummerhouse
Summary: Set in the alternate reality of the SAINW episode. Character death  not a turtle . Violence, language, death. Very sad.


Gone

"Raph!"

April's shout was loud over the din inside their temporary battle headquarters. People scurried in all directions, grabbing essentials and loading them into anything with wheels and an engine that would start.

Raph dodged the swarm of human bodies, moving fast because April's voice had an edge of hysteria to it that he hadn't heard in a while. She was giving orders to a kid who was no older than fourteen as Raph reached her. The kid shot a look at the giant, mutated turtle and dashed off to whatever task April had given him.

April grabbed his arm in a tight grip, her eyes brighter than normal.

"Where's Casey?" Raph asked immediately.

"Zed squadron managed to warn us that Shredder's troops discovered our location. Then they got pinned down. Casey took a unit and went out to get them," April told him, obviously straining to maintain control.

"Why didn't he wait for me?" Raph demanded.

"He wasn't sure how long it would take you to reach us," April said. "Raph, I've lost radio contact with them. I can't send anyone; I need all available hands to evacuate the injured and refugees."

"I'll go," Raph said, starting to move away, but she didn't release his arm.

"I can't ask that, it might be suicide," April told him, the fighter in her facing harsh reality.

Raph searched her eyes and knew she was trying to hide a tiny spark of hope.

"Do what ya' have ta and get these people out of here," Raph said. "We'll catch up ta ya'."

Heavy gunfire led Raph straight to what was left of the Zed squadron. The second in command was nineteen and sported a huge scar from his jawline to his neck. The squadron commander lay dead at his feet.

"What happened?" Raph asked, his eyes scanning the small contingent of soldiers who were among the living. "Where's Casey Jones?"

"Shredder's troops had us flanked," the new commander told him. "Jones and his unit blasted a hole through the middle of the left side and gave us a way out. The troops were moving fast and Jones stayed behind to hold them off of us. He was supposed to follow."

"Fuck!" Raph cursed, his voice low and hoarse. "Stay here and have your guns ready to supply cover. Don't let Shredder flank you again; if it starts ta look hairy, get the fuck out of here."

"Sir!" The kid's voice stopped him. "You can't go in there, you'll be killed."

"Don't worry soldier," Raph said with a grim smile. "Being invisible is what I do."

Skies dark with smoke from hundreds of fires and a hazy low level fog left behind by smoking gun barrels leant him cover. The blast of artillery and grenades were his guides.

He found Casey's unit pinned behind the brick wall of what was left of a high rise apartment building. Shredder's troops were almost on them.

"Where's Casey?" Raph asked as he slid in next to the men.

"Raphael." A big man sporting a t-shirt with the words 'Fuck You' across the front grimaced at the sight of the turtle. "He's out there," the man said. "He drew their fire so we could get behind this wall."

"Start shooting goddammit!" Raph shouted roughly. "Get them off of him so he can back out too!"

The man shook his head. "He ain't worried about getting away no more, Raph."

When the words sank into his brain Raph's head started spinning. Turning so he could lean against the wall, Raph squeezed his eyes shut, clenched his teeth together and let a horrible, gut wrenching pain rise like bile in his chest.

Opening his mouth wide, he screamed at the sky until his throat was raw. Then his mouth snapped shut and he jerked his head down.

"Give me a couple of grenades," Raph told the man, who had watched him with ill-concealed sympathy.

"What are you gonna do?" the man asked, shoving the rest of his grenades into Raph's palm.

"I ain't leaving him behind," Raph said.

Understanding dawned on the man's face. "Oh, fuck no Raph! Those troops are all over the damn place. You're gonna get killed."

Raph turned a glare full of fire on the man. "Ya' worry about getting the rest of these guys out of here. I'll worry about me."

Before the man could argue further, Raph leaped over the wall.

He threw the first grenade while still in mid-air. It sailed sixty yards and into the center mass of Shredder's troops, blowing a wide gap in their formation.

Hitting the ground running, he lobbed the second grenade to the right of the first. The blast ripped apart limbs and machinery as men scrambled away from the concussion of the first grenade.

Then Raph saw Casey sprawled on the ground, his hand still clutching a machine gun. His best friend's eyes were wide and unseeing; his chest covered in blood.

Rage nearly consumed Raph in that moment. Flinging the last of his grenades into oncoming troops, Raph's hands fell to the familiar grips on his sais and he made ready to leap at the first one of Shredder's men to come near.

A flash of light overhead and a rumble of loud thunder made him look down. He couldn't leave Casey's eyes open or the rain would get in them.

The rage disappeared as quickly as that. He hadn't come to fight; Raph had come to bring Casey back to April. That's what he was going to do.

As he bent to scoop Casey off the ground, a loud blast hit the brick wall near them. Debris flew in all directions and Raph felt a sharp pain in his head. Dizzy, he tossed Casey over his shoulder and dashed back to the group of men who were waiting for him.

Dust was in his eyes and he blinked quickly, trying to wash away enough so that he could see. When one eye finally focused enough to give him blurry vision he saw Casey's unit leaning over the brick wall and firing at Shredder's troops.

With a high bound, Raph cleared the wall and was running. Casey's men followed him, and so did Zed squadron when Raph caught up to them. Raph ran at full speed, not waiting on anyone, not speaking to anyone.

His eyes were stinging but he didn't need them; he could sense obstacles in his path. While he ran, he started talking – talking to Casey about everything they'd ever been through together, about every moment they'd ever shared. Raph remembered all of it.

Somewhere along the route they lost Shredder's troops. Raph outran his own men; those who were now swearing their allegiance to him. It didn't matter, they knew where to go.

Raph found April at the new temporary battle headquarters. In a room filled with people, he could only see his sister. Through eyes full of smoke, debris and tears Raph watched her cross the room, one hand pressed to her mouth and her other one reaching for her dead lover.

Relinquishing his friend into her arms, Raph sank to his knees, his head dropping forward. It was then Raph felt the blood dripping from his face onto his hands that lay numb across his thighs.

The blood and blurred vision told him he'd lost an eye. It didn't much matter.

Raphael's Father was gone, Donatello was gone, Michelangelo's arm was gone and the shadows had eaten Leonardo. Now Casey was gone.

Since most of his world had already disappeared, Raph decided he only needed one eye.


End file.
